All About Attendants: Your Gay Wedding Party

Lesbian wedding with male attendants. Photo by Torie Mcmillan

When it comes to traditions, gay weddings have a collection all their own and don’t follow gender-specific roles. Instead of bridesmaids and groomsmen, the gender-neutral term attendants is preferred. But really, you can call them whatever you want – the traditions are yours to make.

Lesbian wedding with mixed attendants. Photo by Katherine O’Brien

If you and your partner share the same sex as your entire wedding party then calling your attendants bridesmaids or groomsmen is totally appropriate. If you choose members of the opposite sex or a mixed bunch, these terms won’t apply. And while attendants is perfectly acceptable, it’s a bit formal. If you want fun names for the members of your gay wedding party, here are a few ideas: Bridesmen, Groomsmaids, Grooms Girls, Bridesmates, Bro-maids, Support Sisters, Best People, Besties, Best Mates, or People of Honor.

If you’re still wondering what to call the people in your gay wedding party, choose something that suits your wedding style and that both you and your attendants are comfortable with.

Gay wedding with female attendants. Photo by Stephen Gosling Photography

According the Gay Wedding Institute, most same-sex weddings don’t include bridal showers and bachelor/bachelorette parties, so the responsibility and actual number of wedding attendants is often less than weddings of heterosexual couples. It’s important to decide on their involvement before you approach them to be in your wedding.

Furthermore, don’t worry about having equal numbers of attendants for both brides or grooms. If one of you wants three attendants and the other wants seven, no big deal. It doesn’t have to be all matchy-matchy, and that includes their outfits. Just as there are no rules for what to wear to your gay wedding, same goes for your attendants. Maybe you want to stick to one color, but allowing your attendants to wear different types of dresses, suits, pants, or whatever they’re comfortable in is the common way to go for gay wedding parties.

Gay wedding party wear kilts via creampuffrevolution.com

Of course, if you’re looking for super stylish attire for your gay wedding party, check out Modern & Sophisticated Bridesmaid Dresses for Fall 2012 and Stylish Summer Wedding Suits.

We’d love to know – what will you call your same-sex wedding party and how will you dress them?

Want even more great ideas for your gay wedding? Follow us on Twitter @Zankyou and like us on Facebook. Also, check out our new obsession Pinterest! If you’re getting married soon, be sure to check out all the fabulous cash wedding registry options at Zankyou!

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Comments (2)

March 2, 2012

This is great even for hetero weddings with bridal party members of the opposite sex. My best friend is a guy and when he asked me to be in his wedding I loved it. I stood on the groom’s side with the rest of the groomsmen but yes I was a “Groom’s Girl.”

March 2, 2012

Holly, I agree. Gender specific roles need to be updated for all kinds of weddings.


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